“You should try for another baby so you can have a girl.”
Everyone when they found out we had boys
If I had a nickel for every time I heard this, well, I’d have a bunch of nickels. But think about the message behind that. It suggests that my boys weren’t enough. That there would somehow be something missing in my life because I didn’t have a daughter.
It wasn’t easy for us to have our boys. We could get pregnant, no problem. It was staying that way that was our challenge. When I was 6 weeks pregnant with the boys, I started showing signs of history repeating itself so we headed to the hospital again. I remember laying on the table, waiting for the ultrasound tech and counting the dots in the ceiling to distract myself from the bad news we’d previously received in that room.
When the ultrasound was happening, the only sound was the clicking of the buttons on the machine. Then the technician started asking me questions. “Do you have any other kids at home? Were you taking fertility drugs?” I didn’t think much of her questions as I was so preoccupied with being back in that room. It wasn’t until she said that she was going to get my husband that I snapped out of my fog. That had never happened before. They don’t bring the husband in to show them bad news on the screen.
I’m grateful to that ultrasound technician for not telling me what she saw on the screen until my husband was in the room as we were able to find out we were having twins at the same time. And from that moment, it felt like all the pain and heartache had led us to these babies. And while all we wanted was 2 healthy babies, I was beyond thrilled when we found out we were having boys.
I always pictured myself as a boy mom. I grew up with a brother and had lots of male friends growing up and I still do to this day. Some of my favourite mom moments have been taking my boys to baseball and boxing, watching WWE wrestling in person, going to see monster trucks when they were little. And I loved and deeply miss all those sweet moments where they’d curl up on my lap and have a cuddle with their mama.
Now that our boys are teenagers, some of my favourite moments are when they ask me for advice on girls and invite me to play video games or watch UFC with them.
Are there days when I wish we had tried for another baby? Sometimes. Is it because I wish I had a girl? Nope. My boys are more than enough for me. They drive me crazy and stress me out but they make us laugh and fill our lives with so much love. And with twin teenage boys, the only thing missing from our lives is peace and quiet, and I’m more than ok with that 💙💙
